The importance of having a community/tribe
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
Bonjour toi,
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about my life and all the changes. I’ve been thinking about the journey it took me to get where I am today. All the sacrifices, the pain, the sufferings, the unknown, and me trusting God and taking risks. I am where I am supposed to be but it came with a price.
The past couple of days, I’ve been thinking about all the “goodbyes”. I said goodbye to many people each time God was elevating me to a new level.
“You are not growing up if you are not losing friends.”
I lost many friends along the way.
With some people, I thought we were going to be friends forever.
In some cases, I did not return the call, I did not reply because I knew it was the end.
End of a season.
End of a friendship.
I enjoyed the time together. I still love some of them. I have good memories.
Did I become more selective?
No, I just changed.
I am not the same person I used to be. I don’t enjoy doing the same thing I used to. I don’t talk the same way I used to. I don’t see life as I used to.
As I was being transformed I was not longer in alignment with them.
The foundation of the friendship was no longer there.
We did not share the same values anymore.
What was important to me was not important to them.
I am not the same person that I was 15, 10, 5, and 2 years ago.
It’s crazy when I think about it.
“To humans belong the plans of the heart, but from the Lord comes the proper answer of the tongue.
All a person’s ways seem pure to them, but motives are weighed by the Lord.
Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”
God led me on this path.
When God said move, I moved. When He said turn left, I turned left. When He said wait here, I waited. When He said turn right, I turned right.
I always move in synchronicity with God.
That’s why I cannot take the glory for who I am today and what I achieved in my life.
I simply obeyed Him. I obeyed Him because I trust Him.
Do you trust God?
“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.”
He established my steps. He directed my steps even if it did not make sense to me.
Most of the time, I walked blindsided trusting His voice.
“The steps of a [good and righteous] man are directed and established by the Lord, And He delights in his way [and blesses his path].”
You have to trust God with your steps. Trust Him! He is leading you to a place that will exceed your expectations, and what you can think or imagine (Ephesians 3:20). He is the God of the impossible (Luke 18:27).
God don’t give us all the answers and all the information we need when we walk by faith.
I trusted God and He surrounded me with the right people. The people that I needed in each season of my life.
I am blessed because we shared a part of the journey together.
It’s hard to say goodbye, but sometimes it’s necessary.
That reminds me a friend back home. We were in High School together. I used to visit her every time I was on holiday in Martinique. Deep down, I knew this friendship was going nowhere. The only thing we had in common was our past. Each time, we met we talked about the past. The people who used to know. The things we used to do. She was not in my present nor in my future. It took me years to face the truth. Eventually, I stop talking to her.
Also, keeping people that are no longer supposed to be in your life does not leave room for new friends.
Keep that in mind!
Continuons…
The journey to get where I am today was long and painful. I am 35 years old and I feel that I had many lives. The path was not a straight line.
It does help to have the right people around you. I passed through the waters, through the rivers, and walked through the fire (Isaiah 43:2). I was gracefully broken by God many times to become the person that I am today.
This is where comes Steven. I’ve known him since I was 13 years. He saw me in each season of my life. He gets me because he knows me. He understands me because he’s seen what I’ve been through. When I talked to him, I feel seen, heard, and understood even if you don’t see everything eye to eye.
The people that I recently met do not know what I’ve been through, who I was, how I used to think, or how I used to be etc…
It’s priceless to have someone around you that can remember the old versions of yourself. Someone that can testify how much you evolved, and how much you changed. Someone who can check on you and tell you the truth. It’s priceless.
Lara, I met her when I was at Uni. We were working together for a charity helping children doing their homework after school. We were 19/20 years old. Our friendship grew stronger with time and now she is like a sister to me. We’ve been through so much together the last couple of years.
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”
Same thing with her, I feel seen, heard, and understood.
She is really a sister to me. We have so many things in common.
We talked a lot about so many things, and she likes learning new languages like me.
This relationship is priceless.
I don’t feel alone with these two people in my life, even if we don’t live in the same country.
You don’t need many people around you, you need the right ones.
It’s important to have people who have your back. People who care about you. People who listen to you. They know you. They know you deeply. They see you. They hear you. They understand you because you speak the same language of your heart.
Life is so much better surrounded by with the right people.
We check on each other. We influence each other. We tell the truth, the hard truth, the one you don’t want to hear. Someone has to tell you the truth, so you can improve, adjust, or change. It’s for your own good. We motivate each other. We cry and we celebrate together.
When they succeed, I succeed. When I succeed, they succeed.
It’s deep.
We faced so many things together. We evolved. We changed.
It’s love.
When one falls down, one can help the other up (Ecclesiastes 4:9). You are not alone through adversities. They are holding your hand. They are comforting you and encouraging you. We all need that, a community, a tribe.
People you can count on.
“Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”
You need people to look out for you when you are weak, when you feel lost and confused, when you are going through difficult times, or when you are busy attending someone’s else needs. It’s difficult to be alert in each season of our lives.
Sometimes, you expect your enemy to come this way, and they come another way.
Who is there with you? Who is there for you?
You cannot stand alone.
You need the right people around you, the people who care about you and have your best interest at heart.
I know, I know, I know. In this society, they praise “the self”. Self-made, self this, self that… You don’t need anyone blah blah blah blah blah…
In reality, it’s hard to do life by yourself.
You can have everything money can buy and be miserable.
You can have all the glory you want, and feel empty inside every time you are alone.
You can be surrounded by many people and still feel lonely because they don’t get you. They don’t see you. They don’t hear you. They don’t understand you, because they don’t speak the language of your heart.
It’s a cross.
You can fool other people and pretend to be happy, but you cannot lie to your own heart.
Life is hard. It’s the truth.
It’s better to do life surrounded by the right people.
It’s important to have a tribe.
You will be happier and more fulfilled.
With love…
